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RIYADH: Abdulaziz Al Sheikh, the Grand Mufti of Saudi Arabia, announced that Saudi Arabia would be completely free of dogs by the year 2014. He said that dogs were being terminated with “exploding pussies”, which were artificial cats installed with smart bombs that went off when dogs approached them. This, he said, had greatly helped reduce the canine population of Saudi Arabia. Adjusting his Swiss Rolex while seated inside an American Hummer H3, the cleric said dogs were symbols of western lifestyle and even Islam considered them as “unwanted and impure”. He said that angels too distanced themselves from dogs.
He said that he expected the rest of the Muslim world to follow suit. Expatriates in Saudi Arabia were forced to sell their dogs to butchers in Riyadh, who say that people consuming them as beef couldn’t tell the difference.

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